Emotional

To say the last few weeks have been crazy would be an understatement. In less than 48 hours we leave for Ethiopia. This adoption journey is almost over and our reward is waiting for us. In 5 days our son will be in our arms - it is just hard to believe!

This journey has not been easy. Every step of the journey has been hard and emotional. I remember when we decided to grow our family through adoption. We were so ready for the battle and challenges that were ahead. We knew that the adoption journey was not going to be easy, and it hasn't been.

At the beginning of the journey we worked so hard. We had a whole lot of money that we had to raise and we had a whole lot of paperwork to do. We were on a mission and God strengthened us to get it all done. I wanted to get my child home as soon as possible. I remember how frustrated I was when I found out that the state rejected my fingerprints. It was the first of many emotional blows in the process. I knew at the time that it was all part of God's perfect timing, but it did not make it any easier.

I remember the day the paperchase was over and we were finally on the wait list! What an amazing day and we celebrated and were so relieved!

Unfortunately, the toughest days of the journey were ahead. Waiting was so sooo hard. Our wait was longer than we originally anticipated and I was really struggling before it was over. Finally the day came and our phone did ring and we got to see the face of our son. But we still had a long way to go and a lot of waiting in front of us. In some ways I still felt like I had to protect my heart.

Finally we got our first court date and as everyone who has read this blog knows, we didn't pass. Court was such an emotional rollercoaster and it was so very hard to find out that we had to continue waiting to pass court. Finally, after 5 tries we passed court - he is our son! It felt amazing and was truly one of the best days of our life.

So here we are, just 2 sleeps away from traveling around the world to meet our son and bring him home. The butterfly's hit this morning and I don't think I can fully comprehend just how much our life is about to change. Don't get me wrong, I am thrilled and cannot wait to get our son home, but life change is scary and this is a huge life change.

Fortunately, I know we are in the center of God's will for our life. He is giving me a peace that is unexplainable. I know He is walking with us. I cannot wait for Sunday. I still cannot believe that we get our son on Sunday!!! He is spending his last few nights in the transition home and soon he will be in his forever home. I just can't help but try to think about the impact us showing up is going to have on him. I look at these still photos we have of him, and there is only so much a picture shows. I can't wait to see him in person, and hold him in my arms, and kiss his sweet cheeks. I can't wait to learn just who Malachi is! I can't wait to bring him home and introduce him to everyone - just 10 more days until home!

My feelings are unexplainable right now. I definitely feel a little hormonal :) My son is coming home!!! I have to get on an airplane in 2 days :) I get to experience my son's homeland! I get to walk into Hannah's Hope and pick up my son in 5 days! I get to bring him forever home in 10 days! No words can explain the emotions I am feeling right now.

I felt like there was so much process to adoption before, but now I can't help but think - this is it? This is all there is to it? Don't they need more information before trusting us with a human being? I just feel so sooo honored that we get to be Malachi's parents!!!